She booked, now what?
Sometimes women that book Boudoir choose to have their partner involved in the decision and some don’t. Either way you will win every time. However, what a lot of partners don’t realize is how to “ride the wave.” What I mean by that is closing the loop on the experience by confirming what your partner learns about themselves throughout the Boudoir Experience. While it seems as simple as sexy photos, it truly is so much more. Throughout the process we make sure to be the biggest cheerleader for our clients. The empowerment that comes with the inevitable confidence that comes through as she goes through the process of getting hair and makeup done, getting a mimosa or 2 in, gets dressed, sees our reactions, and then being walked through a carefully curated set of poses to highlight the things she loves most about her body, getting sneak peaks along the way from my viewfinder.
The more you know
If your partner expresses interest in doing Boudoir, it is important to know why a woman typically books such a photoshoot. Many of my clients have a history of poor self-esteem, and never saw themselves as sexy. Or perhaps have gone through something and are looking to celebrate a life change by getting reconnected with their bodies. It’s empowerment through a sexy means of self expression. All that to say, there is a reason, and her choosing to share this with you, is entrusting you with her sacred sexuality.
The day of a Boudoir session can be very nerve wracking. The anticipation, and nervousness about the ability to pose and look sexy, the self awareness of their body and whether they will even look good. As their partner it is your job to make sure they feel as good as they can before the come to my studio. Making the morning as calm and smooth as possible. Being extra sweet and attentive, let her know she’s going to do an amazing job, I assure you she will.
During the session, we make sure to treat her like she queen she is. The Speak To Me Squad makes her feel beautiful and celebrated, through professional hair and makeup as well as a mimosa bar for whatever her heart desires. Of course throughout the photoshoot ensuring that she feels comfortable and confident, focusing on hydration as well as counter stretching to minimize discomfort after as well. By the time she leave my studio, she is on cloud 9.
On that note, how does one “ride the wave?”
A few months ago a dear friend asked me this precise question. His fiancé had booked a Boudoir session, and he wanted to know how he could makes the experience extra special for her when she came home. *Cue the swoon.* So we talked for a while on the phone, I gave the following suggestions:
- Plan something for after the photoshoot: she spent all this time and money getting beautified, make sure it doesn’t go to waste. Whether it is dinner reservations or some sort of activity, putting the time and energy into planning something after will go a long way. Also, spoiler alert, she will likely be STARVING after he photoshoot, it is way more physical then you may think.
- Pick her outfit for the activity: I cannot emphasize enough, the amount of time, energy, and exhaustion that comes with a Boudoir Session. We just spent time agonizing over her look, take the reins and pick out an outfit for whatever activity you’ve planned so she doesn’t have to think about a damn thing when she gets home. It wills get serious points.
- Flowers or something sentimental: Some small gesture, whether it be flowers or something that would mean something to her. Again, the forethought and the planning to show that today was a big day, and it was brave and she’s deserves it.
This may seem extra, but I promise you, the outcome will result in a more confident and proud partner. It gives your partner the feeling of being seen, recognized. All of the things that she just experienced being reinforced by the person who they want to feel these feelings from most, will benefit both of you, and strengthen your connection.
Being gifted the photos
Honestly, there’s not a damn thing I can really suggest for this. If you and your partner have the connection that lasts a lifetime, you will react in the shock and awe that comes with seeing your partner go out of her comfort zone and sharing it with you. If I can suggest anything, it would be to not minimize the experience. While to some it can be perceived as expensive nudes, it truly is so much more then that. We pride ourselves in working specifically with people who aren’t models. They are women who typically wouldn’t get pictures like these taken, and there’s a significant reason why they choose too. It’s important to validate this and not take it lightly, It’s a gift, to all involved.
